The Unexpected Emotions of Success: Navigating Fear and Embracing Growth

We often anticipate feelings of joy and elation when we achieve our goals. Yet, sometimes, the reality can be strikingly different.

After my intense many months journey towards a professional coaching certificate, I expected overwhelming happiness upon completion. Instead, I was swept by a wave of fear. I questioned if I had ventured too far and if there was no turning back. Reality seemed to weigh heavily on me.

This wasn't an isolated experience. When I was accepted into a PhD program in the US, the pride was tinged with the anxiety of moving to a foreign land. Similarly, my ascent to a senior leadership role, while a significant accomplishment, brought with it the sudden pressure of amplified expectations.

Why do such emotions surface, especially after achieving what we've worked so hard for?

It's our brain's instinctive reaction to change. As we traverse uncharted territories, our mind, attempting to shield us, may stir feelings of doubt, fear, or uncertainty. Recognizing these emotions as protective mechanisms is key.

These feelings have historically guarded us, guiding us to where we are today. However, as we set our sights higher, they might not serve our future aspirations. It becomes crucial to acknowledge them, confront them, and with gratitude, assure them: "Thank you, but I've got it from here."

If you find yourself grappling with similar emotions, here are some steps to guide you:

• 1. Recognize and Validate Your Emotions: Ignoring them can intensify their grip.

• 2. Voice Your Feelings and Thoughts: Merely articulating out loud can help you understand the root of your emotions or diminish the fear's power by realizing, "this thought doesn't make sense."

• 3. Consult a Coach: They are professionally trained to navigate such emotional terrains, offering clarity and direction.

I hope this resonates with you. Remember the innate strength within you. Embark on your journey with confidence, viewing every challenge as an opportunity for growth.

If you found this article thought-provoking, I'd like to invite you to listen to a related discussion on this topic on my YouTube channel.

Navigating the Fear-Driven Corporate Culture

Recently, I sat with a group of fellow coaches, and we touched upon the ubiquitous challenges that corporate employees face and how we, as coaches, can better assist them.

Our conversation highlighted some striking self-limiting beliefs:

• The idea that revealing vulnerability is akin to showcasing weakness.
• The pervasive thought that work-life balance is a mere myth, more so in the world of startups or in higher echelons.

Additionally, certain fear-driven behaviors emerged:

• The reluctance to voice opinions, fearing manager repercussions.
• The need to stretch work hours as a proof of dedication.

This led me to a realization: corporate culture is deeply entrenched in fear. I've personally navigated this space:

• I remember leaving early to pick up my son from daycare, only to face comments about my work ethic. My manager stepped in, noting that I'd continue working post returning home.
• I've often chosen silence over delivering feedback that might be perceived as negative, all to avoid potential backlash.

In essence, it's not just about limiting beliefs; it's genuinely about the fears:

• Fear of receiving a less-than-stellar review.
• Fear of promotions being just out of reach.
• The looming dread of being the first casualty in layoffs.

While employees invest long hours, the question remains: Is it about the hours or the impact? Sometimes, the result isn't in sync with the expectations of the role.

I was taken aback once when a manager I knew said, "I give lower ratings, thinking it will push individuals to work harder."

With such a mindset prevailing, it's no wonder so many express feelings of exhaustion. The mere mention of rejuvenation lights up their eyes, pointing towards the increasing burnout cases.

If this resonates with you, it’s time for some introspection:

• What fears are holding you back?
• What happens if they materialize?

The act of confronting your fears often diminishes their grip. Remember the tale of The Wizard of Oz? The much-feared wizard was but a man behind a curtain. It's similar with our fears.

When the weight of fear eases, your brain's approach shifts. In a high-alert situation, survival instincts dominate. Once safe, a broader perspective surfaces, revealing previously unseen paths.

I've heard some colleagues say they're trapped between two choices:

• Bear the status quo.
• Or simply walk away.

I challenge that. I believe more avenues await, becoming visible once the shroud of fear is lifted.

So, if fear is dictating your life's rhythm, are you truly living? I urge you to embrace courage and steer towards the authentic life you aspire to live.

If you found this article thought-provoking, I'd like to invite you to listen to a related discussion on this topic on my YouTube channel.