The Missing Key That Unlocks Your Future: Peer Energy

Have you ever walked into an interview or an important conversation, feeling like you had to prove yourself over and over again, but wondering why the opportunity still feels out of reach? You know you’re capable, but somehow it just doesn’t feel like others see it too.

If this resonates with you, you’re not alone. Many women experience this frustration. But here’s the key you might be missing: how you show up. And the secret lies in showing up with peer energy.

The Three Types of Energy You Can Bring

There are three kinds of energy you can bring to a conversation, interview, or any professional opportunity: Predator energy, Prey energy, and Peer energy.

•  Predator energy is like a tiger hunting its prey. It’s desperate and driven by hunger. Thoughts that come with this energy are, “I really need this role,” or “I need you more than you need me.” It’s a kind of energy that signals desperation.
•  Prey energy, on the other hand, is like a giraffe being hunted by a predator. They are constantly on guard, overly cautious, and they put the other person on a pedestal, thinking, “You have all the power; you’re more impressive than me.” It’s a kind of energy that signals insecurity.

Many people show up with either predator or prey energy. The problem is, neither of these energies works in your favor. Predator energy comes off as desperate, while prey energy feels unappealing and lacking in confidence.

The Power of Peer Energy

So, how should you show up? Peer energy is the answer. Peer energy sends the message, “I see you, I’m here to help, but I don’t need you, and you don’t need me.” This energy is calm, confident, and deeply attractive. It signals leadership presence and confidence—traits that are incredibly important when it comes to opening up new opportunities.

Think of it like this: a consultant or a doctor. They show up not with desperation or insecurity, but with confidence in their expertise. They know they can help solve your problem, but they don’t need you. And you don’t need them either—you can always go to someone else. But they’re offering a solution because they believe in their skills and experience.

When you show up with peer energy, you bring a sense of partnership to the table, not pleading or desperation. You’re not here to be judged; you’re here to see how you can help each other.

How to Shift to Peer Energy

Now, you might be wondering: How do I show up with peer energy?

The first step is to change your thoughts before the conversation or interview. Here are some thoughts you can have to embody peer energy:

•  I am an expert, and they need my expertise.
•  I know how to solve their problems, and they want what I offer.
•  I’m here to be a strong partner for them, not to please them.
•  I am perfect for this role, but I don’t really need it.

These thoughts will help ground you in your confidence, so you show up as a peer, not someone desperate for approval or validation.

By thinking this way, you’ll notice a shift in your energy. You’ll approach the conversation as an equal, ready to collaborate and add value. This subtle shift can completely change the dynamics and the way others perceive you.

Now, you might wonder when you can ask them about their challenges while you’re busy answering their questions. There are many ways, but here’s one way you can shift that. Let’s say the interviewer asks if you have experience with X. You can respond with, “Yes, I’ve used X to solve Y problems before. However, for your company, if you have Y problem, in addition to X, I’d suggest considering Z solution because [your reasoning].”

This is a major shift from just answering their question in a yes or no format and waiting for them to decide what to do with your answer. By doing this, you start a conversation to discuss their challenges and how to address them together.

Take Action and Make Your Dream Role a Reality

It’s simple, right? But it requires practice. And practice makes perfect.

If you’re struggling with how to show up with peer energy or need help shifting your mindset, I can help. I’ve helped countless women break through these barriers and land their dream roles. One woman, for instance, was ready to settle for a lower-level job after being laid off. After working together, she applied for the same level and ended up with a job offer one title higher, along with a higher salary. She showed up with peer energy, and it worked.

If you’re ready to start showing up with that same energy, I invite you to book a free consultation call with me. Let’s discuss your unique situation and how you can get on the path to your dream role with confidence.